Polenta

Polenta.

It almost sounds a little exotic, doesn't it?

I'm here to tell you that it's not exotic...it's cornmeal mush. (But it's darn good and satisfying with Italian, Mediterranean, and Latin cuisines) I'm also here to tell you that if you are spending 6.99 or whatever it is on one of those moisty, semi-firm logs of it in the ethnic food aisle at the grocery store then you are a spendthrift. Because polenta is cornmeal and water. And the 2.19 you spend on a big box of cornmeal is 2.19 wisely invested because it is likely to last you months. Further, I would be remiss if I failed to mention that your cornmeal-and-water-polenta is going to taste so much better than those preformed logs that go vaguely chemical on the tongue.

I know all of this to be true because I just ate the best polenta in the world: my own 2-month old polenta pulled out of the freezer.

Mi esposo and I have recently been traveling and having gotten in late last night and then out the door again early for work this morning, I have not had time to get to the grocery store to restock our bare shelves. (And when I say my shelves are bare, I am not being dramatic to hit a point home to you, dear readers. My shelves are Old Mother Hubbard bare) I had to zoom straight home from work today, still unable to pause at the shops, in order to take care of a paperwork matter, after which I realized I was quietly starving to death, having had no lunch and all.

Empty as my kitchen is, I absently looked into the fridge anyway. The refrigerator held nothing but some spinach, but it still appeared reasonably serviceable, and some half-empty bottles of condiments. The freezer had the ever-present container of chicken stock, but it's too hot for soup, and lurking way in the back was some polenta, leftover from a dinner months ago. I had forgotten it was there.

Polenta and spinach...maybe with a creamy dressing of some sort (one of those condiments in the fridge!)...that sounded like a lunch I could deal with, so in an act of kitchen desperation, I pulled those things out and tossed them all into microwave. Now, I'll be damned, but that frozen-then-thawed polenta tasted better than the day I made it... and the texture was culinary-school perfect: firm on the outside, yielding to a tender, creamy center. Friends, that lunch was PERFECT. Never mind that it was my only choice.

You really should make your own polenta--so inexpensive, so fast, so easy, so GOOD! I'm posting my "recipe", although it's not mine or anyone's in particular, and you can make variations of this to your heart's desire (substitute milk for water...substitute grits for conrmeal...try different grinds of cornmeal...make it thick...make it thin...etc....etc.....). My only caution is to be very mindful of whisking or stirring constantly and be sure to turn your flame/cooktop down to a low setting. Getting hot cornmeal on your skin is exquisitely painful. A lapful of hot grits from a jilted lover is what made ladies-man crooner Al Green come back to the straight and narrow path. Ga'head...look it up. Don't let my cautionary tale scare you into continuing on buying the sub-standard pre-made polenta, but just please keep an eye on your hot pot.

POLENTA

-4 C water
-1 C cornmeal
-salt, to taste

-cream, milk, butter, or cheese (all optional)

Bring your water to a rolling boil in a medium, non-tippy saucepan (FYI--I salt my water first, but you don't have to). When boiling, gradually add the cornmeal in a very slow, steady stream, whisking constantly. Keep whisking, and as you begin to feel the mixture thicken, lower the heat. Keep the pot on very low, stirring or whisking frequently, until the mixture seems thick but tender (no gritty pieces). For looser, mashed-potato-style polenta, add more water, milk, or cream and butter. For firmer polenta, remove from heat, pour into a pie pan or terrine pan, cover and cool. It will get more firm, even slice-able, as it cools.

It freezes beautifully and tastes wonderful with every vegetable under the sun.

Bacon Double Pizza

Luuuucyyyy---I have a lot of 'splaining to do!

First of all, I know I earned an "F" in cell phone food photography. This is about as ugly a picture as I have ever taken.

Secondly, if I am so insufferably health-conscious, what the heck am I doing making (not to mention eating) a creation entitled "Bacon Double Pizza"?? In my defense, this was scratch cookery and my bacon was local and purportedly handled to the highest humane standards. And I only had one slice. Honest.

The fact that I only had one slice leads me to the point of this post. You can clearly see in the photograph that there are approximately three slices of pizza photographed. They came from a nine-slice pie. Remember now, I ate ONE slice. Where are the other five slices?

This, dear reader, is NOT impossible junior high algebra because I must tell you that those missing five slices are somewhere within my beloved esposo. And this is huge gossip. Some of you readers may have already gleaned that mi esposo is not a foodie. You readers who happen to know me personally also know that mi esposo is a picky eater, who is not given to over-indulgence. He seldom has seconds on any entree, whether or not it was crafted by yours truly or by some legend like Jacques Pepin.

Tonight, however, mi esposo not only indulged in seconds, he went for thirds. This is something of a hat-trick for a chef-wife. I am posting this unattractive picture of this culinary oddity because I really feel like I achieved some sort of coup at the dinner table.

What is this arguably ugly, yet seemingly irresistible pie I have created?? I called it the "Bacon Double Pizza" simply because it sounded like a catchy, all-American name. Like the "bacon double cheeseburger" at every tavern and fast food joint across this great land of ours. Granted, there is plenty of bacon there.... ( I will include the recipe below)... so, if you are watching your waistline or cardiovascular health (like me), do pair your ONE slice with a gorgeous salad of romaine and spring vegetables in the lightest vinaigrette you can put your hands on. You can then get up from the table with a minimum of guilt and worry. If you have no reason to consider things like waistlines and coronary arteries, feel free to kill half the pie in one sitting (like someone else I know)

BACON DOUBLE PIZZA

-1 pizza crust (my homemade recipe is 1 packet of dry yeast, pinch of salt, 1 t olive oil, 1 1/3 C warm water, 3 1/3 C flour)
-8 oz bacon, cooked until crisp
-1 large onion, caramelized (I use the same pan I made the bacon in, for extra flavor)
-1/2 C Puttanesca Sauce (Puttanesca is spicy Italian marinara with lots of peppers and sometimes olives)
-4 generous oz. of finely-shredded sharp cheddar cheese

Compile your pizza and bake in a 450 degree oven for 7-10 minutes or until cheese is melted, and just beginning to turn golden.

Cashew Crema

At work, I've recently gotten a number of requests for vegan dishes which I am glad to accommodate. I actually love requests like this...it's fun to break out of my regular patterns and try new things.

One vegan recipe I have used a few times recently is for a Mexican enchilada entree. Such recipes are all over the internet, and many are quite good, so I won't clog up the information superhighway with yet another vegan enchilada variation. Especially because what I think is so great about this enchilada is not even the enchilada. It's the topping.

If you are not a vegan and if you are anything like me, one of the great joys of Mexican food is the sweet-sour dollop of sour cream or crema that puts a smooth,mellow high note on so many dishes. But if you are following a vegan regimen, sour cream is not going to show up on your plate. To a seasoned palate, the presence of crema, however, goes beyond the realm of "condiment-that's-sort-of-an-afterthought". The crema mellows the heat of any spice that might be there...the lactic acid gives a zingy piquancy...the cream has a barely-there sweetness that compliments the protein. I honestly think that this one little component is necessary for the true completion of the dish.

I was skeptical when I saw that my vegan enchilada recipe called for a cashew crema, but I followed along anyway. Well, I sort of followed along. You see, on a previous occasion, I had hurriedly/recklessly ripped the recipe from an old magazine. In my haste, I only ripped the ingredients listing... I did not rip out the preparation instructions. And when I "harvest" an old cooking magazine for recipes, I toss the rest of the mag. Oh, well. I figured I could figure it out. And I did. And it proved to be a right nice topping that provided all of the same functions of the sour cream. Not bad, vegans...not bad!

So, give this a try if you are vegan-izing any of your Mexican favorites. I'm even including preparation instructions!

CASHEW CREMA

-1 C raw cashews
-the juice of 1-2 limes
-1 t white vinegar
-1 T canola oil or similar mild-flavored oil
-salt, to taste
-water (optional)

Put the cashews in a saucepan and cover with warm water. Bring to a low boil for about 10 minutes, then drain. Place the cashews, along with the other ingredients, into a food processor and let it run. And run and run and run. When it looks smooth, taste. You can add more vinegar or lime to increase the piquancy. You can add water, 1/8 C at a time, to thin to your desired consistency. If it's chunky, keep processing. I allowed my crema to be a little less than perfectly smooth, but you can also strain it for a smooth and elegant sauce.

No, it's NOT sour cream. But it has a certain something and it definitely works in its stead for vegan Mexican dishes. Or Hungarian. Or Russian. Or Greek. Or any sour cream-loving cuisine because this absolutely makes a deliciously acceptable variation to keep your tastebuds, as well as your vegan pals, satisfied.