The Beautiful People

The Beautiful People are at Whole Foods tonight. It's Friday night in Cleveland and everyone with good shoes and perfect highlights is at the corner of Warrensville and Cedar in University Heights.

I had just run in there, on my way home, for a brief moment to grab a few things and was flabbergasted that I had to elbow a boatload of yuppies to get to my rapini.

As a recovering lone wolf, I was, at first, totally annoyed. "Who are these people and what do they think they are doing milling about and getting in my way?!" The huddling (albeit good-looking) masses had plastic wine glasses and were eating pretty things off of festooned toothpicks. Evidently, Whole Foods does these tasting events every Friday evening.

I had no choice but to say "excuse me" a lot and work around the crowd. Visibly irritated, I do-see-do'd with them in Produce. Noticing their Adrienne Vittadini loafers, I dodged them in Cheese and Wine. By the time I managed to power-through their 40-deep line with help from a hippie senior citizen with a big grocery cart and an even bigger attitude somewhere near the Humane Meat Department, my sour-puss attitude was melting away. I was almost ready to whistle a different tune.

I mean, these people were having FUN. They were tasting good, natural, well-prepared food. They were connecting with friendly faces. They were letting their hair down in a healthy way after a long week. Who did I think I was to deny their joy in the arrival of Friday night just because I'm in a (perpetual) big hurry? Plus, if I got myself out of these frumpy yoga pants and Dansko work clogs and into some lipstick and a scarf, I might actually like sharing a laugh and a plate with these folks.

"THAT SETTLES IT. I WANT TO HAVE FUN, TOO!" I thought to myself.

Yes, I admit that I bellyache about food politics and the folks who applaud themselves endlessly for engaging in them. (Quit talking about it and just DO it!) Yes, I admit I've called Whole Foods the Wal-Mart of of the healthy-eating lifestyle. Yes, I roll my eyes at anything that is overtly milquetoast. Yes, yes, yes...I'm pretty much Walter Matthau in a skirt.

But I can walk it off. I like Friday night. I LOOOOVE good food. I like talking to people...even the "beautiful people" at the UH Whole Foods.

So, maybe I'll see you next week. My hair will be out of the work-week tie-back. The Danskos will have been shelved in favor of some pumps. I will dig out the Estee Lauder "Fuschia NOW" lip gloss. I will wax philosophical about Nieman Ranch pork farms. I will have as much fun as a food person can possibly have.

I mean, why NOT??!!